Pride & Prejudice & Zombies, An Unnecessary Torture

The book was terrible, and though the movie is the teeniest bit better, it's still terrible. As a huge Austen fan, one might expect me to be extremely excited about an adaptation with zombies...but no. The only zombie that matters right now is the undead corpse of Jane Austen writhing in her grave. Nevertheless, even when reflecting on the film apart from its rather dull, predictable, suck-y plot, there are an abundance of other reasons to stay away from the movie.

I watched Pride & Prejudice & Zombies as a post-spring break/I don't want to go back to university movie, and while I didn't expect to love or even like the movie, I had hoped that it would at least prove amusing. There were a few scenes - roughly two of them - that had me grinning, but other than that, the movie just about put me to sleep. It's not even that zombies cannot be used to make an Austen novel different and possibly more interesting, but the entire franchise does it in such a mocking, satirical way that fails to keep the viewer entertained. To be fair though, I have made a list or pros and cons to display exactly how boring and unoriginal this movie is.

• This is probably the one Darcy in the world that I do not like. Unlike the actual Mr. Darcy, he annoyed me throughout the entirety of the movie, and I don't know if this is just me, but I thought his voice was also really irritating. Of course, I might be biased, so there's that.
• I didn't even remember the plot of the book - I read it several years ago - and yet I was still able to correctly predict everything that happened in the film.
• I don't believe the main character portrayed in this film is an accurate portrait of Elizabeth Bennet. And Jane Bennet being capable of running people through with knives? Please. Let's be honest though, this entire movie felt off.
• There was no creativity to the plot at all - it is literally just Pride & Prejudice with zombies, and nothing more. Also, several times the zombie scenes felt like they were placed into the film for no real reason, and did not aid in the development of the plot at all.

Matt Smith plays Mr. Collins! I knew he was in the movie but had no idea he played Mr. Collins specifically, and seeing his portrayal was a delight. He's probably the only actor in the movie who played his character well, and watching him was just so much fun.
• There's a scene in the movie where Lizzie just starts throwing things at Darcy for breaking up Jane and Bingley and then they start fighting and really go for it and it's hilarious! Favorite scene ever.
• Bingley didn't "politely vomit into his hands" like he does in the book, and it was such a relief. I am forever thankful.

Every time I think back on the film it just makes me shakes my head, because yes, it was that bad. It could have been bad and still funny, but it was such a bore both during and after the actual "viewing" of the movie. I would assume, however, that this film might be more enjoyable if you are not familiar with Austen's works, since that way you'll get more out of the film than random zombies. So yes, Pride & Prejudice & Zombies was better than its book counterpart, but not by much, and I would not suggest watching this film out of any sentiment other than curiosity. Or a love of Matt Smith.


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